"YOU ARE A PUSSY STAND UP FOR YOURSELF OR DIE"

(except more long winded with my objections in between every other word)

which is basically the only way to get me to react, since I'm a useless hippie and such. And despite always listening to advice I never quite follow it. Obviously, once again, being a useless hippie and such, I didn't follow the advice to the t (does that even make sense? There is no "t" in "advice"). I tried though.

It's the first time I've really confronted this particular person. I've been afraid of really objecting to this person because it's been a bit shaky, and in the beginning when it was strong there was nothing to object to. Mind you, it's been 4 months that we've been involved and we've avoided any even minor disputes.

I'm always afraid of a) the flood of apologies which just makes me feel guilty b) yelling, which makes me feel stupid or c) no response. And I know, person, that that's dumb. But I listened.

I phrased my confrontation like this (it's pretty standard):

Something nice

Part of the problem

"and I get it, and I'm okay with it"

My actual problem

After which I did not get apologies, and I did not get yelling or disappointment. I did not get any of the things I was expecting. Instead I got

Wow.

Wasn't that bad, really. I smiled. Sincerely, and not from repressing laughter.

I still have a long way to go, and I have to remember this place I'm at now. Or more importantly I have to remember how I was before this person bitched me out. My standard response to something I didn't like or didn't want to accept was "no it's okay" or "it's fine". It still is, because most of the time I am okay with it, but I might not like it, and there's a difference to not liking it and being okay with it, and not being okay with it.

But still, I know the person I ought to thank will probably read this.

So

and I hope someone's sincere gratitude kind of cheers you up a bit. And I'm sorry for being such a stubborn ass about it :)